If you are using a Wand, I recommend putting some kind of fabric between you and the vibrator to soften the vibes. The world is too full of the self-hating ideal and we women need to gather up together to break that ugly and antiquated concept. It doesn't matter if I pee before or after and try to use it again. This change to my vaginal lip meant that, on top of the pain of the stitches and general post-partum healing to sensitive skin, I was getting new friction abrasions simply from sitting, wearing pads and underwear, to this skin that was no longer protected by the vaginal lip. Even 14 months postpartum I still have little desire to have sex, but we have been actively trying to conceive since about 6 months postpartum so it happens on a regular basis.